Why love feels the way it does: It’s all science!
You may think it’s pure magic. Or, that Cupid has indeed sent a gold-tipped arrow speeding your way. In truth, all the euphoria, ecstasy, the crazy feeling that you’re in freefall that comes with the early stages of being in love have to do with your BRAIN and neurotransmitters. Not to spoil your romantic mood, but we thought you might like to know how love works:
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Love at first sight
Yes, it exists. But those pick-up lines you’ve been perfecting may not be all that useful. Psychologists say that it takes between 90 seconds and 4 minutes to decide if you feel attraction for someone. Some 55% of that decision is based on body language and 38 % on the tone of the voice, not what is being said.
Lust happens
Mad desire often precedes the process of ‘falling in love’. Scientists have now pin-pointed that testosterone and oestrogen are responsible for that urge to ‘go get him/her’.
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Walking on air
According to studies, the second stage of love is attraction. This is when your neurotransmitters go into overdrive, producing adrenaline and dopamine. It’s dopamine that causes euphoria and that feeling that you’re walking on air. The same substance stimulates the pleasure centre of the brain, and ‘desire and reward’. Some scientists go as far as to say, the feeling is not dissimilar to a cocaine high. Fuelled by dopamine, you feel like you don’t ever need to sleep, have truckloads of energy and feel elated by the smallest details of your new-found love.
That beating heart
When you fall in love with someone for the first time, you stress response is activated, and there’s a rush of adrenalin. It’s the adrenalin that makes your heart pound and why we possibly associate love with those big, red hearts. Your sweaty palms and racing pulse is also caused by the adrenalin rush.
Crazy in love
What falling in love also does is to lower serotonin levels in the brain. Scientists who studied couples in the early stages of their relationship compared their serotonin levels with those of people who had Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and found they were the same. Which is why you can’t stop thinking of your sweetheart, you obsess over him/her and say ‘I’m madly in love’.
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Love is blind
Love really is blind. Psychologists say that in new lovers the brain takes over and makes you exaggerate the virtues of your partner and ignore the flaws. Those who have just fallen in love also overrate their relationship, rating it more special than anyone else’s.
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The nesting instinct
Nature has its own way of ensuring that the human species stays well and keep reproducing. So, the euphoric attraction stage passes once the two people are bonded strongly enough. And you will feel that the heady feeling is gone. Lovers then enter the ‘attachment’ phase which is required for them to stay together and raise their young. It’s not much different from the animal world. Cementing this attachment is oxytocin, the powerful hormone released after sex, which is also called the cuddle hormone. It ensures that couples feel much closer to each other and also binds new mothers to their babies. Vasopressin is another hormone which performs a similar function.
So, get attracted, fall madly in love, grow close and live happily ever after – exactly as nature intended.
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